BREAKING: Childrens Lives Endangered At St. Hedwig School!
I SHIT YOU NOT!!!
To: Parents
Subject: turtle Date: Tue, 01 May 2007 13:11:11 -0500Parents-
There was a large turtle on the parking lot of the school during second lunch. No student was in danger and the S.P.C.A. responded within minutes and removed the turtle.
Dr. Jane Barfield
Tags: Local Media Sucks!
You have to feel for school adminstrators. If Barfield failed to send the email, some crazy ass parent would have probably raised hell.
Be happy you get frivolous emails. My child’s school administrators didn’t see fit to contact me when my child’s bus was over an hour late for school. I only found out about it *weeks* later and then only by accident.
I agree Duffy,
just found it amusing.
Apparenlty it was a snapping turtle and was huge. A bite from one of these guys would have been serious, but assuming you know where St. Hedwig’s school is, you have to wonder where the hell it came from?
No doubt the turtle could have chased down some of the obese kids.
Ah, there was no mention of this being a snapping turtle. They are nasty beasts and you could lose a finger if he got you.
Come to think of it….where the hell did he come from?
Good question. According to the wikipedia article on snapping turtles, it was either looking for a place to lay its eggs (but it’s a little early in the season, and cool to, so more likely it was fleeing some kind of habitat destruction. Or it was trapped in some kind of micro-habitat and had to migrate to find a mate. What construction is going on around St. Hedwig?
Anon,
do you know anything about where St. Hedwig is? 🙂
based on your questions I’m going to assume no.
I’m laughing here, no offense to you of course, but the only habitat being destructed is from the shit bags that live in the area. The drug dealers, the lazy POS people that throw their trash all over the ground or just in general the people that don’t give a Shit about where they live.
The only “construction” going on around that area is deconstruction.
I will give you the fact that it was fleeing the area. I fled the area 4 years ago, thank god. I guess I forgot my turtle when I did.
thanks for commenting
I hope the turtle’s ok. Pretty hard to find a mate when you can only move at .004 mph.