Cohenology 101: The Death Rattle part 1
I’m not sad that Celia Cohen is finished.
She abused her virtual monopoly by using the trappings of journalism to protect and prop up her friends. She squandered her reader’s presumption of journalistic objectivity and now that she has been exposed as the vindictive and small minded hack that she is, she has nothing.
Her perch is gone. Her insider status has been swept aside by a nuclear bomb called the internet and she is left with only impotent rage.
Now then class – let’s begin with a definition.
Wikipedia says that a death rattle is a gurgling or rattle-like noise produced shortly before or after death by the accumulation of excessive respiratory secretions in the throat.
Those who are dying may lose their ability to swallow, resulting in such an accumulation.
I should have recognized last night’s post for what it was. But I missed it. With the clarity that a good night’s sleep brings – it is obvious to me that Cohen has released is a death rattle.
On the surface Celia appears to be disciplining an out of control GOP that wantonly “corrupted” her “journalism” for crass partisan advantage.
” REPUBLICAN MANIPULATION” she yelps.
“The Republicans appropriated a story…” She fumes.
“manipulation” and lack of “integrity” She cries as she stomps here tiny feet.
I should have know at first glance that this is not about Republicans. As we know from our study of Cohenology, like everything she writes – it is about Celia Cohen. It is about how Celia Cohen fits into Delaware’s political ecosystem. This burst of bile is about how Celia Cohen has lost her insider status and it is about how Celia Cohen needs to express her rage about losing her status by lashing out at Dave Burris.
I will delve into the elve’s decline and the death of her relevancy over the next few days. But in the meantime – you have homework.
Read this recent Cohen post.
Celia is no deep thinker and her comment re the victory of Baby Biden over Ferris Wharton seems to demonstrate it.
The outcome of this race was a bigger loss for the state than the candidate.
Wharton was a lot better as a prosecutor than as a candidate. With Beau, it seems to be the other way around.
Regrettably, charisma often trumps ability to govern. This is an old scenario in politics. It did not start with Jackson vs J. Q. Adams and will regrettably not end with Biden vs Wharton.
One might ask how long iot will be before Capano is sprung.
I think she just needs to have her meds adjusted.
Castle is viewed favorably by 63 percent…
Castle is popular. Biden’s kid has a birthright. These are parts of the Cohen worldview that we’ll examine, but I think you missed the larger point of the homework.
What was the the upper half of that post was about?
Anyone…?
Anyone…?
Her post said that the “incumbent” or safe candidate is in the right, while the “outsider” has sinned against destiny. Markell offers a “Change” from the current status quo (Allegedly) so she makes him look bad. Besides, she gets to keep another incumbent if if loses the primary.
The question is: did she really do the paparazzi-style following of the car to Markell’s office?
Well you guys are on the right track. I’ll probably get one this for a longer Sunday morning feature type thingy.
I just noticed something else. Nowhere in the celebrity journo-porn is there any information on the actual position. We’re actually supposed to be impressed that a position exists. Wouldn’t a journalist present facts?
Bingo.
And that Markell/Carney thing was not only lacking in substance but it was written to be about nothing at all. Not even the pretense of substance.
Here is the whole story.
A Markell volunteer/staffer listened to a Carney speech.
Even the people quoted in story were like “What?” They are perplexed.
Now you have to wonder what Celia was thinking as she typed up that one and filed it.
My years as a Cohenologist tell me that she was thinking “I’ve got nothing.” She must have known how vapid and useless that column was. She had to know that the vapidness and uselessness of that column was symbolic of her present uselessness.
I’m going beyond where I wanted to for today. Soon I’ll tell you how the internet, the end of the Delaware way and Celia’s inner demons all crashed into each other resulting in the ”REPUBLICAN MANIPULATION” outburst.
Well, Celia wasn’t out to report on Carney or Markell’s position on science and the economy. She Celia was just trying to present a quick vignette about the presence of the Markell staffer. More along the lines of an entertainment reporter rather than a political reporter.
Hmmm…..?
The list below are the Grapevine columns leading up to the “campaign notebook” vignette.
A DIFFERENT ROLL CALL – Vaughn’s 1 hour mourning in Smyrna. Posted: Oct. 16, 2007
A SALUTE AND A WINK – the horrid “Fox Catcher’s” at cocktail hour. Posted: Oct. 15, 2007
RUDY, YES, BUT BUSH, NO, AND JOE BIDEN, MAYBE SO – FDU Polling Summary. Posted: Oct. 12, 2007
STATE SEN. JAMES T. VAUGHN SR., 1925-2007 Historical ribute to Vaughn. Posted: Oct. 11, 2007
PEEK-A-BOO CANDIDATES Levin & Markell Posted: Oct. 9, 2007
SPECIAL ELECTION TRIVIA 14th SD Posted: Oct. 5, 2007
CAMPAIGN NOTEBOOK Delaware dynastic politics. Posted: Oct. 3, 2007
STATE GOP CHOOSES SCHOOL BOARD LEADER FOR SPECIAL ELECTION Posted: Sept. 29, 2007
Which story, if any, has any real journalism?
Which story, if any, demonstrates that Celia has some access to any scoop or insider chit chat?
Name one from above that is more political reporter than entertianment reporter.
hmmmm… so nobody’s talking to Celia anymore, all her Democratic and Republican contacts are now talking to Burris, Garrett, or Matthews instead.
I’m sure Mike Castle still returns her phone calls and is a source of comfort.
You got the second part right.
As for the first part, I’m not saying that she does not have some little bit of utility left for people wedded to the status quo.
I’m saying the salad days are over and the paparazzi story was like an alcoholic eating a stick of speedstick.
The status quo is unacceptable.
The status quo is unacceptable.
What struck me is that taping an opponent’s speeches has been SOP since the last election, and CC’s just now noticing it — and acting as if it’s some kind of dirty trick!