A mormon, baptist minister and a war hero walk into a bar and they all say to the Bartender I’m running for president and am going to tell you why you should vote for me.
The bartender stares at them a while while he is drying high balls (not his balls, high balls people) and says ok, you first, pointing to the Mormon.
The mormon says I should be president because I think that a piece of dirt in Missouri is the promised land.
The bartender puts down the glass and says you next, pointing to the pudgy baptist minister.
The minister pops off his bar stool, spreads his arms and says that we need to protect the children, we need to put god into the constitution and abolish homosexuality. he sits back down and smiles wryly at the bartender who then points to the decrepit old facially scarred war vet.
As the war vet stands up, he has a heart attack and dies.
What’s the part that so funny you ask?
THEY REALLY ARE RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT!