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Filed in National by on August 14, 2008

Michael Phelps just solved the world hunger problem, while at the same time discovered the cure for cancer and then after he took his morning dump, it appernetly was taken to a lab where researchers learned that his excrement held magical bacteria that will fuel our cars!

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  1. mike w. says:

    It certainly seems that way given the coverage…….reminds me of the fawning over a certain Democratic Presidential nominee.

  2. Joe Cass says:

    All that at only 12,ooo calories a day!
    Fish-boy consumes more than a small village.

  3. rsmitty says:

    Actually, I just heard this on a commercial on WDEL where it says John Carney did all of that. Paid for by the Democratic State Committee of Delaware (deldems.org) and not by any candidate committee.

  4. Phantom says:

    Did you also know that each time he takes a stroke in the water it calms the oceans and spawns multitudes of endangerd fish. Also, each time he comes up for air a whale and dolphin are saved from human predators. Finally, when breaking a world record and winning a gold he is able to achieve world peace.