I think most of you know a little about my history and the early Donviti days. If you don’t well, here is a little back story.
I was 19 when I found out, actually 18, I was 18 when I found out my girlfriend was pregnant. 19 when my first daughter was born. I was barely a high school graduate and the only thing left for me to do I felt was join the military and provide a better life than the one I was on the path to currently.
I joined the Navy somewhat knowing how hard things were going to be, but if I did my time (4 years) then after that I could finish up college and avoid ever having to live on skid row again. 4 years is nothing but a blink of an eye when you expect to live to 90. 4 years of hell to make your childs’ life better is worth it. But, of course in typical donviti style, 1 child wasn’t enough, I had to go ahead and have 3. Making it three times as hard on myself.
The military provided me a roof for my kids and about $18,000 for college aka the Montgomery GI Bill. On my military salary I qualified for Food Stamps and WIC. A disgusting truth that still applies now to the men and women that serve. I used to be embarrassed that I qualified for those things, then at one point I said to hell with it. Why should I be embarrassed? My government should be. They aren’t though. Just look at Walter Reed Hospital as proof of the caring for the men and women that serve.
I swore I would never be in this situation again. While underway I was taking 2 college courses at a time. I would sit in the corner of the Torpedo room, 2 torpedo tubes to my right, loaded with tomahawk missles, dawn Sony headphones and watch a 13 inch television for 45 minutes 2 times a day to catch up on the lesson being taught for that particular course. I would read my text books instead of sleeping and at the same time I was qualifying to be a submariner. It wan’t fun, but it was for my future.
I left the Navy with about a years worth of Credits for College. It took me several years and a few managers that had told me I didn’t need college to get my degree. I got it so I would have the piece of paper that puts me on the top of pile when it comes to employment interviews. It isn’t the only thing, but it is something and I know all the data behind the amount of money a college educated person makes in his life time verses a dropout or a high school graduate. I didn’t want to have to worry about being out of work and not being able to find a job somewhere.
Fast forward 16.5 years later and I’m in the same boat (pun intended) as I was back then. I’m at a cross roads in my life again. I’m currently unemployed and wondering what the hell am I going to do. I’m past the point where I’m confident I can get another job any time soon. Especially not for the same income I had. I have applied for entry level jobs, jobs that are 15k less than what I was making when I got let go on New Years Eve. I have even tried to change careers. Nothing. No luck at all. It is bad and it is getting worse.
My wife and I have spoken about me sucking it up, being Mr. Mom during the day and going to school for my Masters at night and weekends. I’m on the fence with what to do and still applying for jobs. Headhunters are still calling me for jobs but the employers that are getting my resume are turning me down.
So, as I debate about what to do with my future the reality of life has kicked me right between the legs yet again. My wife and I have savings. Not the 6 months of salary they recommend, but a few months none the less. We don’t have credit card debt. Well, that’s not true. I bought my wife a Christmas gift on credit that I shouldn’t have, but that she deserved and we have a few hundred dollars left before it is paid off. It was 0%, I’m not that dumb at least. Other than that, we don’t use our credit cards and have tried to cut costs where we can. I turned off my cable and now and frequently at the Library borrowing movies and reading more books. The internet is helpful too.
A few days ago we went to our accountant to file our taxes. We usually do pretty well because I do donate quite a bit each year to charity and also have a few kids to claim. Each year, whatever we went over board on during Christmas we pay off as well as the credit card debt we had racked up redoing our home and buying furniture and appliances. It’s taken 5 years but we dug out of that hole and this year, 2009 was going to be the year we enjoyed our income and really socked away some $ for my 2 daughters about to hit college.
This past year we put ourselves into a good situation economically JUST IN CASE something bad happened. I think we all knew what was going to happen to our economy and working in the banking arena I wasn’t confident at all I’d have a job in 2009.
You can plan and plan and plan all you want. But when you go from making $70,000 a year to a $300 a week unemployment check, it is hard, very hard to adjust. You can’t save money anymore. You clip more coupons and you go with out a lot of the foods you were used to. You allow the kids to have cereal for dinner because, well a box of cereal is 2 bucks. Making a dinner is about $10 or $15.
I’ve rambled I know. How has life kicked me in the balls? We were hoping to be able to use the tax money (still dont’ know the amount of the return) to pay bills like the pesky mortgage and car payment and avoid racking up credit card debt. We have been in that hole and it sucks. We have savings and once you tap that, it is a scary feeling to know that the our glass has been started and once the final grain runs out you are really fucked. We are inches away from tapping it, actually we are closer than that.
I had the chance to buy Cobra health insurance after I was cut from my job and I opted not too. Paying $1000 a month for health care and draining my savings instantly doesn’t seem prudent and logical. I was under the assumption that I was going to be working with in 30 days regardless so why waste the money I have taken so long to save for. My son had a fever last Thursday. I prayed for the first time in a long time that he would be ok. What else am I going to do? I had no other recourse. I was so terrified that the fever was going to be bad that I didn’t tell my wife the night I found it that Thursday evening. I wanted her to get some rest because she is the one that is working now and I didn’t want to tell her because her being a new mother would have wanted to call the Doctor at 10pm which would result in him/her telling us to go to the ER if the temp is XYZ for X number of hours. A five month old with a fever isn’t as bad as a 2 month old but it is bad. And it can get really bad if your child doesn’t eat. As many children don’t when they get sick. They don’t take the bottle, get dehydrated, whither to nothing and get deathly ill. Little Viti had a fever for 2 days and we stayed home. Made no calls and rode it out. A visit to the Doctor would be $100 or so, a trip to the ER would be even worse. That is our thinking now. That is what having no health care caused you to do. It is awful. It is a form of child-abuse.
We made it past the fever, but a cough developed. The cough was really bad to the point he would vomit up his bottle if the coughing fit occurred while he was or just had eaten. After the fever now we are on bronchitis/pneumonia alert.
As luck would have it, little Viti ate like a CHAMP the entire time. He didn’t eat full bottles like normal, but he snacked every couple of hours. His cough is subsiding and I think, hope that he is out of the woods for now. His cough is still there but it is more of a clearing cough than anything. We are safe, for now. Until the next illness creeps up and a doctor visit can’t be avoided. I don’t even want to think about anything major.
So, now that that disaster was averted other things like the windshield wipers crapping out on you have popped up. As luck would have it they died two days ago. Of course it isn’t the fuse. That would be a $5 fix. No, it is electrical and it will have to be serviced. I can only imagine how much that is going to cost. It isn’t a repair you can put off either. So, on the credit card it is going to have to go.
If that wasn’t bad enough, my dog Lulu started limping yesterday. We found a large bump the size of a golf ball on her rear leg. It has red splotches on it and is hard and I am fearing the worst. I had noticed the bump a little while ago when it was much smaller, and paid it no mind. She was fine and was being typical Lulu. Now, I can’t ignore it. She wasn’t able to go up the steps this morning and you can tell the leg is hurting her. One more thing I wouldn’t have put off if I had the money to do it. She would have been to the vet for her normal check up and it would have been looked at then and nipped in the bud.
Obviously we don’t have pet insurance so I can only imagine how much it is going to cost to have a vet tell me the bump has to be removed and is cancerous. The visit and the tests that will need to be done to see if the bump is cancer will be a couple hundred I’m sure. Even if it isn’t cancer it is going to have to be removed and I’m sure an operation on a pet is several hundred if not close to a thousand. Now I’m fearing the worst and wondering what I’m going to have to decide regarding my dog’s life if it comes to that.
So, there you go. Within in 7 days, my son has taken seriously ill, my car needs repair and my dog may or may not have cancer either way she needs to be operated on soon.
I’m an American. I served my country. I paid my taxes. I donate to charity. I volunteer my time. My children volunteer their time. 2 of my daughters work. And now, to certain parties I’m a pariah. I’m a bottom feeder that doesn’t deserve help. The unemployment benefits I receive are good enough. Anything more and I will live off the teet that is Mrs. Liberty and become some government leech that never gets a good job and betters this country on his own sweat and blood. God forbid I have health care for my son. He is worthless piece of flesh that doesn’t deserve medical treatment.
Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.