David Anderson, a staunch defender of his own impenetrable asshole, is afraid that seeing homosexuals living together freely will turn him into a phallus-obsessed man-slut. If a gay-married couple moved in next door to him, Anderson fears he will suddenly be filled with carnal desires that will leave his anus in shambles. He testified today in support of SB 27, feverishly sweating the idea that his marriage will become a bitter sham after thousands of gays start wining and dining him to win his acceptance of their marriage proposal. “Marry me, David Anderson,” he imagines they will say. “I will offer you a gay lifestyle that your wife can never match!” Or maybe he’s afraid his wife will take up golf? Who knows. If Anderson watches this video, it may destroy his marriage forever.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9G75tH2wfvQ[/youtube]
OK, I guess I just turned Anderson gay. And possibly communist as well. All in a day’s work.
Commenters, please tell us how gay marriage will make you want to get divorced. Who knew that the only thing holding marriage together these days was an inability to marry a partner of the same gender?