So, Ya Wanna Date Jessica Simpson?

Filed in National by on July 13, 2009

It’s Heartbreak City for Jessica Simpson. On the day before her 29th birthday, her longtime beau, Tony Romo, broke up with her.

As a public service, the Beast Who Slumbers clues all her would-be suitors into what she’s looking for in a mate:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3yipg8DIdq8[/youtube]

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  1. Great Smitty's Ghost! says:
    July 13, 2009 at 5:04 pm

    …and all the Cowboy teammates celebrate (and I, an Eagles fan, boo). It’s become obvious over the past few years that to keep Romo from choking horribly at the worst time (best time for me), he must change to being asexual.

  2. nemski teh awesome says:
    July 13, 2009 at 5:14 pm

    This is funny as last night I was flipping through the channels and watch a repeat of the Eagles spanking the Cowboys at the end of the years. It was a beautiful thing . . . even as a repeat.

  3. Rhymes With Right says:
    July 13, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    Not a chance, buddy — at least not without a preventive innoculation with full-spectrum antibiotics before each date.

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