Delaware Liberal

If I Were A Republican Woman I’d Be Insulted

Reading this article brought two things to mind – The Stepford Wives and Enjoli…

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4X4MwbVf5OA[/youtube]

Ah yes, you’ve come a long way, baby.

Right-wing women rock.

Not for us the sturdy, honest calves of the New Democrat/Green Party female, honed on eco-tourist rainforest hikes.

Those legs are often on unfortunate display, extending from a knee-length tweed skirt as hairy as the legs themselves, and end in a pair of Birkenstocks.

I have yet to see a pair of Birkenstock women’s shoes that didn’t look like part of the required uniform for police SWAT teams. Sensible shoes are one thing … quite another to don a pair that look like they’re meant for rappelling down the sides of buildings with a Heckler & Koch sniper rifle slung over your shoulder.

The primary reason our womenfolk are at war with the looming spectre of the nanny state is because you can’t buy Jimmy Choos in a socialist paradise.

The only sensible footwear you’ll find in a right-wing woman’s closet are the Nike cross-trainers that go with her gym membership.

Everything else has a three-inch heel. Minimum.

So… the primary reason for their womenfolk’s (love the possessive, btw) ideology is buying Jimmy Choos?   Seriously?  And I realize Ian wrote this article in an attempt to sneer at liberal women, but I think he achieved just the opposite – because any woman (R or D) with a brain abandoned this “who’s prettier” game in junior high school.

Moving onward – or, rather backward.

A right-wing woman hits the gym, swings past Sobey’s and has dinner on the table by the time you get home … while her left-wing counterpart is still stuck in traffic listening to Sarah McLachlan on her iPod and feeling morally superior about her carrot choices.

And when that plate of food is put in front of you by the right-wing hottie you had the good sense to marry, it will be 100% tofu-free. If you’re lucky, she just remembered to buy steak and forgot about the carrot entirely.

My, oh my.  Where to begin?  Is this right-wing hottie you had the good sense to marry wearing Enjoli while she waits on her man?   Ooh, and did she change out of her gym clothes and into a sexy, little black dress – complete with her 5″ Jimmy Choos – before she put the plate in front of him?  Which also creates the image of the man sitting at the table waiting to be served  – as obviously is his right.  The article goes on to say that most Republican women have careers and prefer to raise traditional families, or at least hire a vetted nanny.  Where I’m sitting I have to ask:  What is hubby doing while his right-wing hottie is working, raising a traditional family, going to the gym so she stays hot, buying groceries and Jimmy Choos (actually, according to Ian, their womenfolk are shop-a-holics,), cooking dinner and serving it?

Oh yeah, Republican women should be insulted.  In one article they’ve been reduced to tits and ass with a credit card.  Even when Ian tries to give them a brain, he fails.  Unless you consider running a household budget so there’s enough money left to buy 500.00 shoes and telling your husband that he can’t go to the Super Bowl every year makes you a financial genius.  But, let’s face it, this article really isn’t about women.  It’s about men.

And if this is the normal thought process of the Republican man then Republican women have my sympathy.  And I’m beginning to think Ian’s opinion isn’t an outlier.  Just look at the way Republican men react to Sarah Palin.

BTW, I don’t remember seeing any Jimmy Choos at the tea parties?  I must have missed them.

Exit mobile version