I Call Shenanigans
Balloon Juice posted about an essay in American Thinker supposedly written by an 11-year-old boy. In the essay he details the horrible discrimination that he’s faced as a conservative kid in school.
My name is Sam Besserman, I’m eleven years old, I live in Beverly Hills, California, and ever since I can remember I have been subjected to political bias in school. The first time I noticed the bias was actually in preschool where the teacher was reading a book about the importance of mothers and the inferiority of fathers. I tried to tell the teacher that dads might be just as important. The teacher responded in a sing-song, “No, listen to me, I’m the teacher.” Of course, the girls loved the book and most of the boys hated it, except for a few who liked it and also wanted to become mothers some day. I was three years old and royally pissed off.
I had to listen to such feminist ideas every day and, at times, I actually bought into them. Months later, I still didn’t know whether mothers were really more important than fathers. Once I even felt like going into the bathroom and trying to pull off my penis. It wasn’t that I wanted to be a woman, I had just lost my enthusiasm for my embattled gender.
Let’s stop right here for a second. This kid wants us to believe that he remembers being indoctrinated into feminism at the age of 4? And that it made him so emasculated that he had to check his genitals?
The only male teacher I had might as well have been castrated. His voice was soft, his gestures were feminine, he didn’t know how to run a class and he had to rely on female assistant teachers to control the children. And, of course, the female teachers treated the girls ten times better than the boys and constantly reminded us of our alleged inferiority. One of the assistant teachers even put down our rhyme, “Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider,” by reminding us that more girls than boys go to college because girls are smarter. And this only encouraged the girls to hijack our rhyme and switch the sexes around.
The nerve of that teacher telling boys that girls are just as smart, if not smarter than boys. Obviously this teacher is part of the liberal/feminist/communist plot to teach the truth to children. School should be all about teaching girls their proper place in the world and making sure that Sam Besserman’s beliefs never get challenged.
Let’s review. This 11-year-old, Sam Besserman wrote the following sentence: The only male teacher I had might as well have been castrated. All I can say is that the boy has obviously had excellent teachers to be able to write so well.
What purpose does this essay serve other than to convince other conservatives that they are the victims and therefore are entitled to act like assholes? Perhaps the editors of American Thinker published a clever parody to show how many adult conservatives act like children with a grievance. What think you?
Tags: American Thinker, Balloon Juice, Republican Bamboozlement
Such transparent bullshit. The wingnuts eat this up though, and heroic little Sam will be a speaker at the next Republican National Convention.
“And this only encouraged the girls to hijack our rhyme and switch the sexes around.”
sounds like someone needs to change their skirt.
Poor oppressed conservatives. They really have had it hard in our nation’s history. We stopped letting them have slaves, we stopped letting them deny blacks and women the right to vote, we stopped letting time force children to work 10 hours a day for pennies… hell, we even forced them to give up the king and accept our liberal democratic form of government. It really has been a rough 250 years for the american conservative.
If i hear one more white male bitch about how his life is made harder because of his skin and wang, I’m gonna commit a hate crime.
It seems to me that a lot of conservative writing is geared to convincing conservatives that their lack of success is because all these undeserving people are given breaks that you’re not getting.
Am I the only one who remembers that rhyme as being the other way around in the first place? We used to say that bit about college and knowledge in the 80’s with it being girls going to college. This “kid” is totally claiming credit for something that wasn’t his in the first place.
After all these years you’d think I’d have given up. My country is undermining itself in its schools. It’s teaching boys that they can’t even compete with girls. It’s teaching those of us who have pride in our country that it is misplaced. It’s teaching nonsense and claiming that it’s science. But, possibly, even more usefully, I think I have struck comedy gold.
After all these years? He’s supposedly 11. Although… the last line is true – this is comedy gold.
The comment about pulling off his penis is very disturbing, and, if true, this “child” needs counseling.
The most telling comment, however, is the one about the rhyme. So… this kid can dish it out the insults, but then whines when the girls hijacked our rhyme and switch the sexes around.
I got more stupider by clicking through and reading the whole contrived asshatery.
The story reads like a hot, steaming pile of fabrications.
I am nine years old and I dare say that Liberals have extirpated this once great country with their misandry, loose morals, shoddy vocabularies and poor grammar.
It will be Glenny-poo’s new battel cry. Again, if you are white and male and can at least pass as straight, you have no place complaining about anything ever.
“never ever?” said the fat redneck with the victim complex.
no. never.
The internets being the internets, this thing will be fully exposed and nearly forgotten by three this afternoon.
But it will live on forever in Republican fundraising letters.
Royally pissed? I have three teens in the house and I don’t remember even one of them ever using the word “royally.” However, they have chanted the college/knowledge rhyme before, usually at me and with the girls going to college.
How much does anyone remember from age 4? I remember my brother being born, and that’s about it. And my dog.
“embattled gender”????written like a true liberal–but an 11 yo old one?–let’s send him and the Balloon Kid to camp. Maybe this is their “prank phone call” of the 21st century….
But on another note—and I KNOW Pandora agrees w/ me–sometimes I really do feel bad for the way guys get the demoralizing “role” assignment at times.
The father in most conventional TV sitcoms is a bumbling idiot. I’m not sure if that is a reflection of liberal Hollywood’s misandry, or of the fact that there is a large market for shows with bumbling idiot Dads.
Most of my early teachers were,for all practical purposes,sexless nuns.They treated both genders equally.Knuckles were barked with yardsticks with no accommodations made for age or sex.They did seem to give a pass to students who had an affinity for doing outstanding cross action and bead work.
Yeh—let’s bring back the nuns….AND penmanship.