Chicago Sun-Times columnist Terry Savage is really proud to be an douchebag. Read this charming story of encountering girls with a lemonade stand who weren’t actually selling lemonade but instead giving it away.
His fiancee smiled and commented, “Isn’t that cute. They have the spirit of giving.”
That really set me off, as my regular readers can imagine.
“No!” I exclaimed from the back seat. “That’s not the spirit of giving. You can only really give when you give something you own. They’re giving away their parents’ things — the lemonade, cups, candy. It’s not theirs to give.”
I pushed the button to roll down the window and stuck my head out to set them straight.
“You must charge something for the lemonade,” I explained. “That’s the whole point of a lemonade stand. You figure out your costs — how much the lemonade costs, and the cups — and then you charge a little more than what it costs you, so you can make money. Then you can buy more stuff, and make more lemonade, and sell it and make more money.”
I was confident I had explained it clearly. Until my brother, breaking the tension, ordered a raspberry lemonade. As they handed it to him, he again asked: “So how much is it?”
And the girls once again replied: “It’s free!” And the nanny looked on contentedly.
This is important to Mr. Savage because it has a very important lesson.
No wonder America is getting it all wrong when it comes to government, and taxes, and policy. We all act as if the “lemonade” or benefits we’re “giving away” is free.
Apparently the girls are actually members of Congress. Who knew? Has Mr. Savage never heard of charity?
BTW, I call shenanigans on this story. Surely this guy isn’t this much of a douchebag.