Your Favorite End of the World Scenario

Hollywood never met an end of the world scenario it did not make millions off of. What is the scenario that you most want to experience? And I am not including the Rapture as an option.

Alien Invasion–First contact with aliens is probably the one historical event left that I want to witness (I had two historical events, but wouldn’t ya know it, we went ahead and elected a black President). But the problem is, as any Star Trek fan knows, no advanced and peaceful species is going to contact us in our pre-warp state. The Prime Directive applies. So we might as well accept the fact if Aliens are going to contact us now, they are going to be malevolent, intent on our annihilation so that they can have our planet. But ever since I saw V as a kid, I have longed for this:

Election of Sarah Palin, or for that matter, any of the current crop of Republican Presidents.–Hyperbolic much, Delaware Dem? Not anymore. The current policy positions of the Republican Party, if enacted, guarantee the end of all life on this planet. Having Sarah Palin as President… whew … my mind can comprehend many things, but even I cannot fathom the simultaneous horror and inexplicable comedy that she would bring. But since we are pretty much living out this end of the world scenario right now, with only Barack Obama standing between us and total destruction, let’s move on to the next one…

Yellowstone Supervolcano Eruption–This one scares me a little, because it is supposed to happen at any moment. But while it would destroy North America, it really would just cause another ice age for the rest of the planet, and humans can survive that.

Nuclear War–The “Day After” scenario. I am comforted by the fact that I live on the East Coast and work in the fourth largest city in the country. That makes it a safe bet that if there is a nuclear war, or even a nuclear terrorist attack, then I will die instantly in a flash of painless blinding light. Because if there is one thing you don’t want to do, it is survive a nuclear war. If you were close to an explosion, you will most likely die a horrible and painful death due to radiation poisoning in a couple of weeks. And if that doesn’t get you, you will eventually die of cancer at some point, all the while living in a post atomic horror where society has collapsed and everything you touch is toxic, all the while knowing that your generation ended it all. Talk about guilt.

Massive Worldwide Earthquake / Tsunami / Polar Realignment –The “2012 Movie” scenario. The problem with this scenario is that it really is not the end. Many will survive, and rebuild. That was the biggest disappointment for me in that movie. People survived. It wasn’t the end, as all the 2012 Mayan hype tells us. Plus, do you really want to live in a world were John Cusack survives the apocalypse? I think the survivors would envy the dead.

Asteroid / Comet–The “Deep Impact” or “Armageddon” scenario. The nice thing about this is that we will get some warning. So we will have a couple of months of saying goodbyes and partying it up. But there is no doubt about it: in this scenario humanity is obliterated. The planet itself will survive in some form, and in a few eons life will again grow. But we humans are fucked.

Zombie Apocalypse–The “28 Days Later” scenario. Either the dead rise from their graves (silly), or a virus infects humans (i.e. the Rage virus). Either way, the infected roam the Earth looking to feast on the normals. Eventually everyone becomes infected, until there is nothing left to eat, and then we all starve to death. Sounds unpleasant.

Plague–The “I am Legend” or “Outbreak” scenario. SARS. Mtoba virus. Ebola. Bird Flu. Everyone gets sick and dies. Painful and gross deaths too.

Solar Eruption.–The “Knowing” scenario. An explosion on the Sun sends out a massive flare that scorches the Earth until it is burnt to a crisp.

So, which is your favorite? Vote in the poll.