Let Me Be the First to Say, “F*ck Iowa” (Open Thread)

Filed in National by on January 3, 2012

Why the country’s two main political parties allow bunch of rubes and hayseeds who don’t have enough sense to move out of Iowa have so much power is beyond me.

About the Author ()

Jason330 is a deep cover double agent working for the GOP. Don't tell anybody.

Comments (30)

Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed

  1. puck says:

    Rubes in the heartland, far from the financial and educational centers on the coast, have always been preyed upon by travelling snake oil salesmen profiting from their ignorance. Nothing new here.

  2. John Young says:

    I wonder what they think of us stuck up, rude, east coasters?

  3. jason330 says:

    Even is there are a few decent Iowans (a dubious proposition), I get why the candidates are not saying “f*ck Iowa.” They want to win. But why isn’t the whole rest of the country saying “Fuck Iowa?”

  4. John Young says:

    Should they also say Fuck New Hampshire? or how about Fuck Delaware? Just sayin’

  5. Geezer says:

    “I wonder what they think of us stuck up, rude, east coasters?”

    Correct answer: “Who gives a fuck what they think? They’re a bunch of stump-jumping, shit-kicking hayseeds.”

    “Should they also say Fuck New Hampshire? or how about Fuck Delaware? Just sayin’”

    Try to follow the argument, John. Delaware doesn’t hold the fate of the nation in it’s short-fingered, grubby hands.

  6. John Young says:

    Why is their such hatred for Iowa though, doesn’t seem particularly tolerant or progressive. Short of all states running primaries and/or caucuses on the same day, somebody’s got to go first,no?

    Also, why does IA kick our ass here: http://www.cnbc.com/id/37516043

  7. John Young says:

    Geezer: Correct answer: “Who gives a fuck what they think? They’re a bunch of stump-jumping, shit-kicking hayseeds.”

    John: my point exactly.

  8. skippertee says:

    We should have primaries or caucuses in the same order the states entered the union.
    Then, we’d be first and in the firing line.
    But that would be OK.

  9. puck says:

    The O’Donnell endorsement might actually help Romney out there. I wonder if he is mentioning it.

  10. puck says:

    One thing you can say about Jason is he has been consistent in his views on Iowa:

    http://delawareliberal.net//2007/12/18/fuck-iowa-and-fuck-iowans/

  11. jason330 says:

    I aint no flip flopper.

  12. Joanne Christian says:

    Well, why shouldn’t Iowa go first?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKWgXSpnz6Q&feature=related

  13. anonone says:

    Maybe because the majority of both major parties are also rubes and hayseeds. There, it isn’t beyond you now.

  14. Geezer says:

    John: It’s not hatred. It’s disdain.

  15. Geezer says:

    “Well, why shouldn’t Iowa go first?”

    Wrong question. Why should it go first?

  16. anonone says:

    Geezer wrote: “Delaware doesn’t hold the fate of the nation in it’s short-fingered, grubby hands.”

    Well, with Biden the Clown, Delaware is only a heartbeat away, so to speak, from doing just that. Besides, unlike the short-fingered, grubby hands of Iowa farmers, Delaware has the long, slender, and suave hands of pickpocketing bankers.

  17. puck says:

    Iowa has a 5.7% unemployment rate. Just saying.

  18. Geezer says:

    You can’t blame Biden on Delaware anymore. Obama took him nationwide. But you’re right about our fingers.

  19. Geezer says:

    Far more interesting Iowa fact: It now gets 20% of its electrical power from windmills.

  20. Joe Cass says:

    How many delegates at stake? Fuck the folks wasting million$ in Corn Central.

  21. walt says:

    Something about Middle America that you never understand until you’ve lived there for two or three years. And I can’t even describe it. They’re a different breed of cat, and they AINT DUMB.

  22. jason330 says:

    They went for Kerry over Dean, so that explodes your theory.

  23. John Young says:

    Jason, you need to embed lee brill’s link, it’s great.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=qLZZ6JD0g9Y

  24. walt says:

    Neither Kerry nor Dean made any difference thereafter. Their’s was the losing party that year.

  25. walt says:

    Neither Kerry nor Dean made any difference thereafter. Their’s was the losing party that year. You saw who they picked when it was the Dems’ turn to take power. Obama then went on to slaughter the field in the general election.

  26. cassandra m says:

    Iowa’s answer isn’t quite honest. Their farm industry is heavily subsidized (although the ethanol subsidies are expired)and concentrated on corn and soy beans which either feed livestock or are reduced to food additives that aren’t good for you. Their unemployment rate is currently low, but that is partly due to the fact that their young people leave the state at a pretty high rate. The old manufacturing jobs (or butchering jobs) that used to pay a middle class wage are fewer and fewer or taken up by Hispanic immigrants who will work for less money. There was probably a time when Iowa could have fairly represented a cross section of the US, but it certainly doesn’t any more.

    More than the Iowans themselves, the process itself is something of an anachronism. Lots of candidates running all over the engage in the kind of retail politics that no place other than NH actually gets. And don’t get me started on the media circus around this stuff. Especially for the GOP who are getting away with some of the worst extremist stuff I’ve ever heard and it gets passed on, with ohsoobjective rigor to the rest of the world as normal discourse.

  27. jason330 says:

    And yet…my butt hurts from that spanking.

  28. socialistic ben says:

    ive always been a fan of the 5 week primary idea. each week, 10 states get their primary…no friggin caucuses.. groups will be set up so each group of 10 has some large electoral states and some groups have…. delaware and wyoming. (there are other small states than delaware and wyoming, ass hole) The groups would rotate every primary season so we never have to worry about Iowa again… just to be mean, put them in Pa, or Florida’s groups.

  29. anonymous says:

    A new party. The Justice Party will have Rocky Anderson, a real true progressives as its candidate. They may not be ready for 2012, but surely they will by be 2016. RockyAnderson has been a true blue progressive, and working for the citizens for many years. Frankly, after Obama signing that NDAA on New Years Eve, has done it for me.