What We Know

For all the “debates” the GOP has been through, I don’t feel liek I know much about the candidates. Who are these people? What are their likes and dislikes?

Romney likes firing people. He dislikes being pinned down to one position on things.

Santorum likes people to not have sex, except to produce squirming young’uns. He dislikes neckties ties and gays.

Gingrich likes being a fat, smug, bomb-throwing, pie head. He dislikes the hell out of losing to Romney.

Paul likes wearing shirts that fit him last year before he started shrinking. He dislikes government.

Perry is stupid.

Huntsman likes speaking Chinese. He (probably) dislikes looking at his camping checking account statements.