Al Mascitti, Bill Cosby And Me
I have avoided this topic, mainly because it seems so obvious. Bill Cosby drugged women in order to sexually assault them. That’s my opinion and I’m sticking with it. Via NYT:
While Mr. Cosby insisted the only drug he had given Ms. Constand was Benadryl, he was open about his access in the 1970s to quaaludes, a sedative also popular as a party drug.
He said he obtained seven prescriptions for them over two to three years from a doctor in Los Angeles, ostensibly for a sore back but in reality to give to women.
He admitted to giving young women quaaludes at that time “the same as a person would say have a drink,” he said, but not without their knowledge.
Though he portrayed the drug-taking and sex as consensual, Mr. Cosby — when asked whether Ms. Serignese was in a position to consent to sexual intercourse after he gave her quaaludes in 1976 — said: “I don’t know.”
So, he admits to that – and that’s a biggie.
Which brings me to my conversation with Al Mascitti. Al did a good job today, but he was up against a ton of stupid with Wally and John. The kind of stupid women deal with on a daily basis – yep, even from “Progressive” men. The theme, which is constantly on display, is that women are liars, set out to destroy innocent men’s lives. After all, why would Cosby – a famous, rich man – have to drug women to have sex? Women are falling over themselves to have sex this guy… right? Here’s the answer. Remove sex from the equation and insert power. Of course, Cosby could have sex with a lot of women, but he didn’t want those women. I’m not even sure he wanted sexual acts. What he wanted was power and control. See the difference?
And there are too many of these guys in society. (I, and LiberalGeek, have linked to this study before.)
He found them by, over a 20-year period, asking some 2,000 men in college questions like this: “Have you ever had sexual intercourse with someone, even though they did not want to, because they were too intoxicated [on alcohol or drugs] to resist your sexual advances?”
Or: “Have you ever had sexual intercourse with an adult when they didn’t want to because you used physical force [twisting their arm, holding them down, etc.] if they didn’t cooperate?”
About 1 in 16 men answered “yes” to these or similar questions.
Everybody got that? 1 in 16.
It might seem like it would be hard for a researcher to get these men to admit to something that fits the definition of rape. But Lisak says it’s not. “They are very forthcoming,” he says. “In fact, they are eager to talk about their experiences. They’re quite narcissistic as a group — the offenders — and they view this as an opportunity, essentially, to brag.”
What Lisak found was that students who commit rape on a college campus are pretty much like those rapists in prison. In both groups, many are serial rapists. On college campuses, repeat predators account for 9 out of every 10 rapes.
And these offenders on campuses — just like men in prison for rape — look for the most vulnerable women. Lisak says that on a college campus, the women most likely to be sexually assaulted are freshmen.
They. Brag. About. It. As long as you don’t call it rape. Using physical force? That’s okay. They didn’t want to have sex? Go on ahead! Too drunk to consent? Well, that’s a green light – with the added bonus of it being her fault!
And if you defend this behavior (or blame the woman), please know that YOU are a big part of the problem. If you trot out Duke or Rolling Stone’s bad journalism as examples – YOU are part of the problem.
Basically, if you dismiss voter fraud as a real issue, but trot out false rape accusations (even though they are in line with every other false criminal accusation) YOU are part of the problem… and probably relate to MRAs (Men’s Rights Activists) and PUAs/Anti PUAs (Pick-Up Artists/Anti-Pick-Up Artists) – you know, like Elliot Rodgers.
If you think most women lie about these things – YOU are not only part of the problem, YOU give cover to those raping women – because if the miniscule amount of false accusations (which rarely – and I mean rarely – result in prosecution, let alone any sort of punishment) is your focus, then your focus is screwed up. But, I’d bet that’s deliberate, because if this is the hill you’ve chosen to die on, while ignoring other hills (falsely accused of murder, embezzlement, robbery, etc.) then you need to reexamine where you are coming from and why sexual crimes against women hold a uniquely special place in your outrage. If you are not crying “innocent until proven guilty!” for people charged with murder, embezzlement, drug dealing, etc. then you need to sit down and be quiet about this… or , better yet, ask yourself what’s so different about this accusation?
We need to teach our sons about consent. I have a son, and I have all the same fears as you have. I am not anti-male. In fact, I probably worry more about my son than my daughter, because pregnancy isn’t something I have a say in when it comes to him and his partner. That’s her call. So when it comes to sex I talk about the consequences (out of his control) more with my son. Go figure.
In August my daughter becomes a freshmen at university. Am I worried. Sure. I know there will be predators targeting her – predators egged on by good guys. What would make me sleep better is if we could all teach our boys to not only understand consent, but to call out the 1 in 16 who brag about their assaults over brewskies. Imagine if men started calling out this behavior. It would go a long way.
And because this always needs to be said… #notallmen.
Tags: Featured, Men's Issues, Women's Issues
I guess there were no comments b/c there’s nothing more to say.
Thanks, Pandora, for a great critique. As someone who has sent two daughters to college, I think this should be required reading. For every guy out there.
Based on my experience, it would be difficult for most of the 15 of 16 men that don’t rape to “call out” men that do.
Like any human (man or woman) my creep radar is on, and I’ve managed to avoid befriending the type of person that would brag about that type of rape. Even in college, 30 years ago, I would have been shocked to hear someone brag about something like that.
It’s so hard keeping track of all the “rapist” accusations flying around. First it was Mexican immigrants; now it’s US college men.
The larger and more rigorous DOJ study found that college women were less likely to be raped than the similar age group in the nonstudent general public, and the overall victimization rates were much, much lower:
Of course the DOJ was asking the women; not the men as Lisak did.
The 2002 Lisak study may be a wake-up call of some kind, but is hardly the ultimate statement or even an accurate one on prevalance of college rapists.
Not saying anyone is lying; just trying to keep it grounded.
Also keeping it grounded — from page two of this report where they discuss differences in study data:
And it doesn’t matter which study you are looking at — the current prevalence of college and non-college rapists is too damned high. Women should not have those kinds of risks in a so-called civilized society. No one will ever be able to make that risk zero, but I don’t care what stats you use, the current and persistent culture that allows this level of violence against half of its population is unjust.
the current prevalence of college and non-college rapists is too damned high
Agreed. We are a nation of laws, and the way to reduce prevalence is through the law. That means incidents must be reported to police, and police must take them seriously, and the courts must punish those found guilty. Rapists belong in jail. Once enough guys are in jail for those date-rape types of incidents that they used to get a pass for, word will get out. Just let’s not forget about that pesky “find them guilty” technicality.
In the meantime, it looks like if you want to lower your risk of sexual assault, enroll in college.
I never understand why asking people to explain consent to their children, especially their sons, is a bridge too far. I don’t understand why the only answer to this problem is law enforcement. It’s like saying there’s nothing to be done until after an assault/rape occur. (Of course, people have a long list of what women should do.)
And even I have heard guys (possibly) self-report. I’ve heard things like, “Man, I tapped that last week” while then going on about how wasted she was. And there’s where other guys should step in (since most of this talk happens between men) and point out that that behavior is wrong. And I’m not saying they should call the police. I’m saying that reinforcing the message that having sex with a drunk person, holding someone down, etc. is wrong is the first step in changing behavior.
What I find really disturbing is the amount of men who don’t think having/forcing sex with someone who doesn’t want to (or can’t consent to) have sex isn’t rape. The amount of men who think “no” means try harder. And the way our culture reinforces those messages.
I just think we have a way to reduce this sort of behavior by simply calling it out. And we all (at some time in our life) have known that guy.
What’s interesting is that we’ve done this when it comes to racial, bigoted words. We took terms that were used easily and often and made them taboo. (Of course, we didn’t eradicate them, but we did lessen their use.) And we didn’t have to call the police and press charges. Imagine that.
Right. And I don’t get people who would look at a study on the risk of rape while in school or no and conclude that college is a better deal (in the face of irregularly reported data)– when we are still talking about a high rate of violence against women no matter their location. A reduced risk is when it is *rare* and when it is important to men to be a part of making it rare, rather rationalize *reduced risk*.
I wonder if we have to view it as asking corporations to regulate themselves. Im not being snarky here…. essentially, we ask corporations (who are not people, but who’s decisions are made by people) to do the right thing…. we cant trust them to, unless there are sever consequences. Loudly and publicly punish offenders. (im not willing to go as far as awarding people for doing the right thing in THIS instance.)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzFKtqEy5ZQ
I’ll just leave it at– Benadryl was a prescription drug in the 1970s Mr. Cosby. And really was not that easy to get….you usually were well on your way to already seeing an allergist.
Oh and Pandora…I know I can’t remove all the fears of what comes down to either weapons, brute force, violence, and body size…….but a wing girl (or bat girl :)), and your daughter’s quick thinking has her far on the way in the socialization side of the freshman frenzy.
>Benadryl was a prescription drug in the 1970s Mr. Cosby. And really was not that easy to get….you usually were well on your way to already seeing an allergist.
Really? I was a child with hay fever/ pollen allergies in the mid-late ’70s. My pediatrician had no qualms about prescribing both Actifed and Benadryl.
I spent a LOT of time sleeping when I was in 2nd grade.
Very creepy. A famous guy like him doesn’t need to drug women for sex. It’s some kind of perversion that he enjoys similar to necrophilia
“It’s some kind of perversion that he enjoys similar to necrophilia”
It’s called “rape,” and it’s far worse than necrophilia because it involves a living victim.
And Cosby’s MO is hardly unique. Many rapists use drugs and/or alcohol against their victim.
What Cosby’s behavior (very common among rapists) shows is what we’ve always known: Rape is about power and violence. This case makes people pause because having sex with women wasn’t a problem for a famous guy like him.
Here’s the deal… Cosby’s rapes weren’t about something as rare as necrophilia. His behavior was quite common among men like him.
It keeps getting more and more disgusting. Will there ever be criminal charges, or did this happen in a state where there is a statute of limitations? He needs to be made an example of.