The Republican President Speaketh

Filed in National by on March 1, 2017

So, the Republican President holds his shit together for an hour and pundits burst into orgasm. The bar is really fucking low right now.

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  1. mediawatch says:
    March 1, 2017 at 10:57 am

    I was working on my laptop in the kitchen while the TV was on in the family room, so I didn’t listen to much of it. I’m tempted to take heart from the fact that he sounded more like a president and less like a campaigning carnival barker … but the brutal truth is that he aligned himself more closely with Congressional Republicans on virtually every issue he mentioned.
    And I’d much rather have a buffoon as president, with a couple of rational cabinet secretaries pulling in the reins and walking back his statements than a dealmaker in an unholy alliance with the insensitive, uncaring Republican majority.
    I’m hoping the tweetstorms resume before the end of the week.

  2. headball says:
    March 1, 2017 at 11:24 am

    I could hand a 6th grader a 12th grade textbook and the kid could probably read it out loud. The kid also probably wouldn’t understand much of what it said either. My impression while listening to him speak last night was similar.

  3. Jason330 says:
    March 1, 2017 at 11:32 am

    “The bar is really fucking low right now.”

    True Fact. Many billions* of pundit orgasm were had.

    *I’m using Trump math.

  4. bamboozer says:
    March 1, 2017 at 12:22 pm

    My opinion of pundits runs neck and neck with my admiration for Paul Ryan and McConnell, and I agree the bar is now set several feet below the ground at this point. Should be noted that the media in general remains pathetic and still seems unable to do their job. As for Trump I have no desire to projectile vomit so I did not watch.

  5. Elated says:
    March 1, 2017 at 12:29 pm

    The bar is low now? You bet it is. Have you seen Pelosi recently? What is the deal with the cuckoo clock sound in the background everytime she speaks?

  6. Alby says:
    March 1, 2017 at 1:43 pm

    “What is the deal with the cuckoo clock sound in the background everytime she speaks?”

    What, is Fox resorting to sound effects now, so their product better resembles the Three Stooges one-reelers it was modeled on?

  7. Alby says:
    March 1, 2017 at 1:50 pm

    I was looking through some magazine back issues before recycling them yesterday when I found Matt Taibbi’s piece in the Dec. 1 issue of Rolling Stone, in which he authored a mea culpa for misreading the electorate. I was struck by this passage:

    “Many reporters, myself included, found themselves thinking about this film [“Idiocracy”] when we heard voters saying they were literally incapable of understanding the words coming out of Hillary Clinton’s mouth.

    “When [Trump] talks, I actually understand what he’s saying,” a young Pennsylvanian named Trent Gower told me at a Trump event a month ago. “But, like, when fricking Hillary Clinton talks, it just sounds like a bunch of bullshit.”

    Perhaps this explains the right’s antagonism towards education.

  8. SussexAnon says:
    March 1, 2017 at 1:56 pm

    Trump gave a good inauguration speech, too. Then the 3 AM tweets came back.

    When Trump says “we all salute the same flag”, does he mean Russia, Nazi, Confederate, American? I think he needs to clarify for the sake of his followers.

  9. mouse says:
    March 1, 2017 at 4:27 pm

    Trump’s sentences sound like 4th grade

  10. bamboozer says:
    March 1, 2017 at 5:35 pm

    “Trump’s sentences sound like 4th grade”

    And still much improved at that!

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