What’s a Colostomy Bag Worth?

Sanctimonious shitbag Paul Ryan has proved his impeccable credentials in that arena yet again, criticizing the “secular left” for dismissing his and all conservatives’ call for thoughts and prayers, claiming that “prayer works.” (No links because the shitbag right is all over this one like flies on a dog turd.)

“It’s disappointing, it’s sad, and this is what you’ll get from the far secular left,” claimed the vain Eddie Munster impersonator. “People who do not have faith don’t understand faith, I guess I’d have to say. And it is the right thing to do is to pray in moments like this, because you know what? Prayer works. And I know you believe that, and I believe that and when you hear the secular left doing this thing, it’s no wonder you have so much polarization and disunity in this country when people think like that.”

The phony policy wonk got one “secular leftist” to bite, actor Wil Wheaton, who pointed out that the victims were praying when they were shot, which, y’know, kind of disproves the theory that prayer “works” when someone is shooting at you. He then summed up by calling Ryan a “worthless sack of shit.” Reaction from the victimization junkies on the right was swift, as all the people who insist there’s an Invisible Man in the Sky and that he listens to, of all people, them, once again cried a river of tears on their own behalf.

I do have one quibble with Wheaton, though: Colostomy bags are not worthless, though in Ryan’s case, we are talking about a used colostomy bag. OTOH I have a lot of quibbles with Ryan, which I’ll address in the comments.