Lots of people don’t get this, but all the lying and cheating Republicans do to gain office isn’t unique to them, and many of the techniques the Russians used on social media are perfectly legal if done by domestic actors. The only problem many Democrats had with the tactic is that Republicans beat them to the game. And so it came to pass that Democrats ran a Trump-style disinformation campaign in Alabama to help Doug Jones to his victory over Roy Moore. Great. This means that future elections will be decided by whichever side is more successful at manipulating the mass of Americans who are smart enough to find a voting booth but too stupid to know what to do once they get there.
If you care about whether there’s a smoking gun proving the Trump campaign-Russia connection, the latest big news is that one of Michael Cohen’s cell phones signaled a cell tower in Prague back when Cohen said he wasn’t there. Is it a clue, or a red herring? Who really cares? At this point, does anyone really think the absence of a smoking gun means no crime was committed? If you’re deep in those weeds, the story is worth a read.
If you’re planning a one-car funeral, don’t hold it in North Carolina, where they’re sure to fuck it up. They’ve sure fucked up the no-brainer investigation of an obviously crooked Republican absentee-ballot-fixing scheme. The latest wrinkles are that Democrats in Washington won’t seat the Republican “winner” of the 9th District election, and a pre-existing court case resulted in a ruling disbanding the election board that has to certify a winner. Shit show or cluster fuck? You be the judge.
The New Yorker takes a look at the man responsible for the wretched state of America: Mark Burnett, the reality-show producer who created a mythical, successful Donald Trump to preside over “The Apprentice.” The rest is tragedy.
For comedy, you can’t beat the British Royal Family, which at least provides its subjects with entertainment. The blokes and birds have been getting their money’s worth since Queen Elizabeth delivered her annual Christmas address, in which she called for austerity in the face of Brexit while seated near a gold piano. Approximately every third person in England pointed out the unintended irony of a billionaire who lives on tax revenue calling for sacrifice while sitting in King Midas’ conservatory. Others responded that if people thought a gold piano proved the queen was “out of touch,” wait until they find out she has money with her own portrait on it.