Listen Up everyone. Seriously. Settle down.
As you know, the most important thing in this office is CONFIDENTIALITY. Also, LOYALTY. They are both number one. They are co-equal for me doing my best auditing. Right? because when I win, we all win, right? Only metaphorically speaking, because…you know…you get to continue working here, and that is winning.
Anyway…Also, PUBLIC RELATIONS! It is very very important. Also number 1 in importance. Edith, please stop looking at me like that. We can too have three number ones. Just like the Romans. Jeez…learn some history.
Anyway, before I was so rudely interrupted by Miss Bitchface, I was going to say that during these trying times we must project a calm image of normalcy. So when I say PUBLIC, You say RELAY-SHUNS. Let me hear you. PUBLIC! …..
*crickets chirp in the distance*
Well, we don’t really have time for that, but we’re all on the same page, right? Ok. Good.
Now I’m taking my daughter..uh, I mean my assistant to lunch. Where did I put that office credit card?
He fired at least 33 times in a subway car. No one died but the attack left at least 29 injured.
The New York Police Department has named a person of interest in connection to the Brooklyn subway shooting that injured more than 20 people during rush hour on Tuesday morning.
In a news conference on Tuesday night, Chief of Detectives James Essig told reporters Frank R. James is a person of interest in connection to the shooting.
“As the train approached the 36th station, witnesses state the male opened up two smoke grenades, tossed them on the subway floor, and brandished a Glock 9mm handgun. He then fired that weapon at least 33 times, striking 10 people. The male then fled the scene and detectives are actively trying to determine his whereabouts,” said Essig.
The old “I was just following orders” defense.
WASHINGTON — An attorney for a man who took a coat rack and a bottle of liquor during the U.S. Capitol attack argued to a jury Tuesday that former President Donald Trump “authorized” the assault on the building on Jan. 6, 2021, by convincing “vulnerable” people like his client that the election had been stolen.
After Norway, Finland and Ukraine join NATO, maybe Russia?
Putin’s bullying backfires as Finland and Sweden edge closer to joining NATO