The surest sign that Trump is off his termite-infested rocker: The months-long effort to portray Biden as senile, when of course it’s Trump whose feeble mind is splintering. Last night Trump gave a highly technical description of Israel’s anti-missile defense system: “And they calmly walk to us, and ding, ding, ding, ding, boom, whoosh, boom. They’ve only got 17 seconds to figure this whole thing out. Boop. Okay. Missile launch, shee-boom.” This is what you get when a guy who was a moron in the first place starts losing his marbles.
Israel made an offer to Hamas yesterday: Give us all the hostages and we’ll stop killing you for two whole months. Now who would turn down a sweet deal like that? Why don’t you offer them two fives for a twenty while you’re at it?
Birds fly, fish swim, Republicans lie. Ever since Biden’s infrastructure bill passed, the House Republicans who voted against it, which was all but six of them, have tried to take credit for the projects that benefit their districts, a practice known as “vote no and take the dough.” For example, Rep. Pete Stauber of Minnesota voted no, saying, “I will not be complicit in paving a destructive and irreversible path towards socialism.” So when the feds announced yesterday that $1.05 billion in federal money will build a new span to replace an aging bridge in his district on I-535 across the western tip of Lake Superior, Stauber claimed, “I have long fought for these funds.” He was swiftly called out by the state’s Democrats. I suggest they name it the Hail Socialism Bridge.
Tell me it’s not a motherfucking cult. There’s a bill in the Florida legislature that would give $5 million in public money to help pay “billionaire” Donald Trump’s legal fees. Which once again brings up the question, how fucking stupid do people have to be to give money to someone who claims he’s a billionaire?
SCOTUS surprisingly sided with the federal government over Texas in the standoff over killing Mexicans at the southern border, which has, as usual, prompted Texans to demand secession. Being products of Texas schools, many of them misspelled it “succession.” I’m actually in favor of throwing them out of the union whether they want to go or not.
The floor’s yours.