Song of the Day 8/13: Dolly Parton and Lorrie Morgan, “Best Woman Wins”

Its always satisfying when villains go after each other – you don’t care who wins, you just root for injuries. By that measure, the current catfight between Trump whisperers Laura Loomer and Marjorie Taylor Greene delivers.

Infighting and backbiting are hallmarks of every autocratic regime, as courtiers jockey for access and approval. Greene is frantic because she’s fallen out of favor – Trump pointedly did not endorse her bid for Georgia governor, so she quickly withdrew – and Loomer has his good ear. Add in the fact that Loomer is Jewish and Greene thinks those people wield the space lasers (if they control the weather, Madge, why is Israel still a desert?) and you have the makings of a grudge match that could headline Wrestlemania. If you think these two say nasty stuff about liberals, you should see what they say about each other.

Greene opened the hostilities, taking Loomer to task for some imagined transgression.

Laura Loomer will lie about and slander the best people in order to rip apart other Republicans she is trying to destroy. … 95% of her slanderous attacks are against Republicans. Why does she do that? Because she is not MAGA, she is MIGA. [Make Israel Great Again].

Many people are asking who or what government or what intelligence agency has bankrolled, the twice failed Congressional candidate, Laura Loomer all these years? Because she has never had a real job, she is not legally allowed to own a gun, and she spends 100% of her time trying to funnel her lies and manipulated propaganda to the President of the United States.

Even off her hinges, Greene might not be a match for Loomer, who brought out the heavy-artillery space lasers for her reply.

Speaking of lies, you ruined your entire family by cheating on your husband with a sex guru, and for the last 4 months, you have been doing nothing but spewing lies about the Trump admin because you don’t get enough attention from the Trump admin.

I didn’t inherit a lucrative construction company from my Daddy and ex-husband like you inherited one from your dad and ex husband who is rolling over in his grave about what a lying, low life degenerate his daughter has become.

You know, the same ex-husband who divorced you because you couldn’t stop bending over for multiple men to f**k you inside those CrossFit gyms where you had all of your many affairs. … You call yourself a Christian while you wreck your marriage like a whore and lie out of bloated horse face which has permanent damage from your years of alleged steroid use. Which is why you look like a Neanderthal.

MTG isn’t a Christian. How do you call yourself a Christian when you’re wearing a cross while getting bent over backwards inside the gym by every man who isn’t your husband? She’s on her knees all right. And it’s not for praying.

I particularly relish, amidst that river of invective, the “alleged.”

If you want songs about catfights you have to turn to Nashville tunesmiths. Dolly Parton wrote “Best Woman Wins” for her 1991 comeback LP “Eagle When She Flies,” her first No. 1 country album in 14 years, and enlisted Lorrie Morgan as her foil.