What Will We Do Without Falwell?
I am so confused. Without Jerry Falwell around, how will I know the real reason that Myanmar and China have both been hit with natural disasters this week. It can’t just be random, can it? I need someone to explain.
Tags: Religion
Don’t forget the tornados in the heartland.
I could go all science gal on ya and cite Global Warming…
Besides, I’m sure Falwell’s followers are out there repeating his words and calling him a prophet. I’m also betting that Hagee will step into those shoes at any moment.
I haven’t been keeping exact count, but ever since Pat Robertson announced that hurricane hit New York because God wanted it to, I’ve noticed that about 90% of this country’s national disasters hit red states. I can only assume that God hates the red-state a-holes who claim to love him most, yet never quote a single word Jesus is said to have uttered.
The cynic in me says the televangelists would rather solicit relief donations to expand their organizations and maybe stick to their fingers a little bit. Claimig the victims were punished by God’s wrath would hurt receipts.
Tornadoes in Kansas on the other hand are clearly a punishment for voting Democratic.
The Flying Spaghetti Monster was displeased with them.
That explains the meatball-sized hail.
I bet he’s doing what he always wanted to:
Swordfighing with Freddie Mercury.
When oh When are those folks ever going to learn that God Hates Trailer Parks!!
Has anybody checked in with Hagee? He’s been quick to tell everyone who will listen that Katrina was God’s punishment to New Orleans for planning a Gay Pride March the following week.
Nevermind that the French Quarter — ground zero for most NO decadence — was pretty much fine.
Al already touched on him. All you need to do is locate Pat Robertson. Not only will you get the reasons why it happened, you will also get his self-congratulatory, “Just as I predicted it,” or, “Told you so, nahnee nahnee boo boo!”