Question of the day
If I think my 15 y/o daughter is smoking but I’m not sure of it can I use enhanced interrogation tactics on her and her friends to find out?
My arguement is yes because:
1. It is a matter of life and death
2. It is illegal
3. she is a minor and a ward of my house
4. It isn’t abuse, it would merely be like me teaching the back stroke
I can’t think of anything worse than smoking. Even heroin won’t kill you as quickly as smoking. I wouldn’t even wait for evidence or ‘coerced’ testimony from her friends. Confront her, and just tell her that’s its something she really doesn’t want to get involved with.
Have her come over and meet my mother-in-law who has emphysema. Or have her call a family friend who is a woman who has smoked for 20 years and who sounds like a man. Or light a cigarette in her closet so all her closes smell like smoke.
Explain to her the pulmonary benefits of smokeless tobacco.
Explain to her that there will be no:
1. Driver’s Ed lessons
2. No Driver’s License
3. No Car Insurance
if there is any question in your mind that she may be smoking. Any question. I think that a teenager on the brink of driving would tell you that this counts as Enhanced Interrogation Techniques.
It’s worth playing hardball over this.
Can’t forget about DV’s ex. She’ll sign off on all of that just to undermine him….
Tell her if she doesn’t smoke then more boys will want to have sex with her.
Hope that helps.
If use the waterboard she’ll admit to anything you want her to admit to, so you might want to have a longer list of teenage rebellion items to check for.
It might be more efficient that way.
Seriously – think about this logically for a moment. There are only so many places a kid can smoke:
1. Outside
2. In the home of a friend’s parent who smokes (with the parent not there)
3. In a car
So if she is suddenly spending lots of time outdoors for no provable purpose, she is probably smoking.
If it’s #2 or #3 you have bigger problems.
I say follow Cassandra’s advice with her about the consequences of her actions and being responsible for herself until she is 18, then let her do whatever she wnats, but keep up the lectures.
Save the waterboarding for adult love.
For example, I want Cassandra to waterboard me.
Worst of all (figuratively, of course), and to VC’s point, ex-Donviti will use it against you any way imaginable. Good luck, DV.
Give her a filter-less Camel. See how she does with that.
This might be an opportunity for some enterprising person to develop a home-smoking test for parents w/ teenagers. A pin prick or a little urine and a suggested “scale of consequences” depending on the amount of nicotine discovered by the test.
The possibilities are nearly endless.
dv
Have been there fairly recently. Tough as it is, do nothing. She’ll screw it up and leave you incontrovertible evidence within the next 2-3 weeks; they almost always do.
Then you get to use enhanced interrogation techniques for the sheer fun of it.
I’ve given up waterboarding for the duration, Brian.
The reasons are quite Classified.
Besides, you seem plenty occupied with your gourmet adventures .