Why You Should Come on Saturday
I was having lunch at the Iron Hill Brewery with a friend when my phone rang. The caller ID said that it was “home” calling.
“Hi Honey.”
Silence.
“Hello?”
There was a slight catching of the breath on the other end of the line.
“Honey?”
“The doctor called… It’s cancer”
“huh?”
“Skin cancer.”
and then the world shattered around me.
For the next few weeks we learned about melanoma. We learned that the family doctor that had removed the questionable mole off of the back of my wifes arm didn’t get enough. We found out that they don’t take any chances. We learned how to live without sleep and how to cry ourselves to sleep at night. We learned that there were a lot of things that we didn’t get to do yet and may never get to do. Quietly I tried to imagine explaining my wifes death to a 2 and 6 year old.
The plastic surgeon injected a small bit of radioactive material into my wifes arm at the place where the mole used to be. In an XRay this “lit up” the sentinal lymph node, which was removed for testing. Then they removed 2 inches in all directions from the spot. Up, down, front, back, and into the arm. The result was a “shark bite” that she lived with for 2 years.
The biopsy on the lymph node takes a LLLLOOOONNNNNGGGG time. There is no wait so long as the wait to see if your wife’s cancer has spread to the rest of her body. All the while, those little buggers could be multiplying, infesting organs, beginning the process of eating the body from the inside. It was so very long.
She came back clean. The sentinal node wasn’t effected. But they knew something that they didn’t tell us. They weren’t sure. Two years later, we returned to the plastic surgeon and he sheepishly told us the truth. We were getting a consultation on reconstructive surgery on her arm. The doctor told us that they don’t patch it all up right away because sometimes they have to go back in.
Skin cancer isn’t just something that old people get removed from their face or something that you get after being a sun worshipper for a decade. My wife can’t remember many sunburns. It is dangerous as hell.
And every day I live in fear that it could return.
Please come to the Miles for Melanoma Charity Event this Saturday. We can help find a cure for this killer.
Wow, LG! I had no idea how involved your experience was. And while I can’t make the event, I will be donating to the cause.
Thank you for sharing your story. How long has your wife been cancer-free now?
5 years. I let her read this before it went live this morning and it made her cry. She had never heard the story from my standpoint before.
I’ll be there with a few in tow. A silent, agressive disease, that receives limited funding and exposure–yet devastating and QUICK, when you are in it’s path. Sorry you can’t make it Pandora.
I will be there as well.
Me too, Joanne. I always enjoy hanging out with you! I’m really disappointed that I’m going to miss the fun – and for such a good cause.
I know the story well.
As I was going through upgrade training to be Captain we got the news. I was in a hotel in Atlanta. 15 Nov 2000. The saga went on for 9 months of surgery, chemo with numerous interruptions, massive radiation and many follow on problems.
To make things easier the night I found out my room was broken in to and two credit cards were taken and within six hours almost $10k was charged.
To make the ordeal more pleasant my employer said I could not call in sick because my spouse was ill even though it affected my physical and mental abilities. Most passengers don’t know it but the Captain signs a dispatch release before each flight acknowledging his/her fitness to fly and posession of certain documents.
Mike Protack
I can’t make it, but the husband and I will be sending along a donation. LG – glad that your wife has been cancer-free for 5 years. Mike, hope your wife is the same.
Thanks for telling us this, LG and I’m glad that your wife has been cancer-free for 5 years. Hope she never has to go through that again.
‘Bulo and his wife will also be there. And, remember, this is indeed an essential cause. But the Beast Who Parties is also coming for the hand-crafted brews, the kickin’ James Day & the Fish Fry, and lots of great food and conversation.
Beautifully written, LG. I’m glad your wife got to read the story from your viewpoint. Unfortunately I’m going to miss the fundraiser because my husband and I are attending Netroots Nation in Pittsburgh. I will send a donation. Hopefully someone will write up a nice post on the fundraiser for those of us who will miss it.
Silent but deadly describes melanoma.
My daughter has had 2 ‘things’ removed from her skin one was basal cell the other was squamus cell (sp.). She sees the dermatologist right regularly.
She has been advised to use sun screen…even when driving in the car w/AC on. FYI: the dermatologist has skin protecting products, in perscription strength, and not available OTC.
One, even one who does little ‘work’ in the sun, can not be too vigilent about protecting ones skin.
I am glad you wife has been cancer free for five years.
I wish we could come up north but with the recent paycut for State employees and next week an additional 5% paycut for my partner by going from night shift to dayshift – and me without a job – we just can’t do it right now. Maybe next time.