Gun Nut Logic

Responding to Gov. Jack Markell’s common sense gun control proposals, The Dover Post’s George S. Roof reminds us that gun nut logic never sleeps.

First, there is not now, nor has there ever been a “gun show loophole.” This is a buzz phrase created by the Sarah Brady crew just like “assault weapons” and “Saturday night specials.”

See? If you put quotes around words and concepts they cease to exist. There is no “murder.” There is no such thing as “school shootings” and there is no such thing as “30,000 deaths from firearms” each year in this country.

And the best part is that you don’t even need a time machine to travel back to Aug 17, 1968, to make “Saturday night specials” imaginary. Magic quotes will suffice because they are retroactive.

(Although, hold on a second. It seems that Sarah Brady must have had a time machine. Or some black magic way to travel back to Aug 17, 1968 and invent the totally imaginary term “Saturday Night Special”, a full 13 years before her husband was “shot” by a “handgun.” Brady is devious, to be sure. I’m sure George S. Roof is onto something with this time travel theory.)

To recap. The magical quotes are the lesser known of the three great gun nut rhetorical devices.

1) Slippery slope. ‘cuz if even one crazy person is prevented from getting a gun, we’ll be like Communist China in a few weeks.

2) Infantile Word Play. ‘cuz guns don’t kill people,….wait for it….. that’s right. People kill people.

3) Magic quotes.

Comments are closed because SHUT UP. No gun nut is going to say anything interesting, or enlightening. (Did that sound jaded?)