North Korea (Not China) To Invade America in Red Dawn Remake
So as not to needlessly antagonize our Chinese overlords, the already shot remake of “Red Dawn” is being touched up in editing to remove China as the menace to American liberty and sovereignty.
That makes sense because North Korea is about as formidable an adversary to the feisty WOVERINES!! as the original 1984 bad guys… Nicaragua.
Red Dawn 2011 Release Date: TBD
Red Dawn 2011 Teabag Boner Popping: Ongoing
Bonus: Check out these North Korean Kindergarteners on guitar.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtjvVgNMPtI[/youtube]
The Woverines better bring their A game.
The bad guys in the original were Soviets. The Spanish speaking bad guy you’re thinking of was a Cuban who was brought familiar with counterinsurgency as he had seen it before in Nicaragua.
Is it just me, or is Justme’s Red Dawn boner showing?
Hey, they took over Colorado and totally screwed up my skiing plans, those damn commies.
Ah yes, the conservative wet dream! Kill non-white commies without repercussions and be the hero, which of course leads to getting the girl (but allthewhile secretly hankering for man-ass).
It’s fantabation of the highest order!
LOL… any NK troops parachuting into the US would would eventually run out of supplies, get a part time job at Best Buy, hook up with a local girl, and register for night school at the local community college.
“LOL… any NK troops parachuting into the US would would eventually run out of supplies, get a part time job at Best Buy, hook up with a local girl, and register for night school at the local community college.”
It’s just a thinly-veiled ploy to immigrate here illegally. They’ll end up working under the table for a landscaper, sucking the life out of our social services, and then declare victory. ,
Von Cracker almost made beer come out of my nose.
They were definitely Cuban paratroopers, not Nicaraguans, Jason. But your point stands. I was about to get all enraged at how lame the remake is going to be until you offered that defense, so I feel better now. (It will still probably be terrible terrible, though, as opposed to gloriously terrible like the original.)
WOLVERINES!
Also mad props to anon for the comment at 4:57.