BREAKING NEWS: SUSSEX SECEDES FROM DELAWARE

Filed in National by on March 31, 2009

In a scene reminiscent of the attack on Fort Sumpter in 1860, outraged Sussex Countians have stormed those cool looking fortress towers along Route 1 in the Delaware Seashore State Park. On the beach, confused onlookers could see them waving the new Sussex State flag out the windows.

It is alleged that the secessionists were outraged because it appears Governor Markell and/or his staff did not invite a blogger residing in Sussex County to attend a 7:30 am blogger’s roundtable in Newark. They also seem irate that Sussex County issues did not dominate the discussion.

/snark (or is it?)

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  1. Dorian Gray says:

    I so love having a laugh at slower lower’s expense.

  2. Von Cracker says:

    El-Oh-El!

    Instead of a bail of wheat, how about a flock of chickens shitting soybeans?

  3. pandora says:

    The reaction has been a bit over the top, but bloggers are a sensitive group. 🙂

  4. MJ says:

    Be nice. Here’s a link to some history of the flag – http://www.crwflags.com/fotw/flags/us-de-sc.html. So who didn’t get invited to sit with Jack?

  5. R Smitty says:

    Can we keep everything east of Route 1?

    Hmm…maybe we need to annex about a half-mile or so to the west of Rt 1, too, but that’s it!

  6. Delaware Dem says:

    I don’t know who was invited or not, but the invitees/attendees were Steve Newton of Delaware Libertarian (who was invited but could not make it), RSmitty of Delaware Politics, Dana Garrett of Delaware Watch, Tom Noyes of Tommywonk, Pandora, Donviti, Jason S., Liberalgeek, Nemski and XStryker of Delaware Liberal, Mat Marshall of Delaware Libertarian and DWA, and Mike Matthews of DWA.

  7. Geezer says:

    They already have their state wine: “Maria Evans wasn’t invited!”

  8. Von Cracker says:

    And yes, I’m just kiddin’. I love Sussex, but Kent can stick it!

    😉

  9. jason330 says:

    On the beach, confused onlookers could see them waving the new Sussex State flag out the windows.

    The crowd dwindled in size and enthusiasm when they found out that the county succession rally cry was going to be “A New Direction for Sussex.” and not “A Nude Erection for Sussex!” as had been discussed.

  10. anon says:

    Platform:

    Convert windmills into devices to launch pumpkins

    Drill for oil; there’s only 10,000 feet of sand to punch through

    Gays must go, but leave their money neatly stacked on the dresser

  11. I hear they are bringing in Joe the Plumber to headline their convention

  12. Unstable Isotope says:

    Who will run for governor of the newly formed state? I know their platform should involve inviting bloggers pre-approved by Maria Evans.

  13. anon says:

    Bill Lee is governor by acclamation. No point wasting Sussex money on messy elections; especially since there are no taxes. State capital is Ruddertowne.

  14. liberalgeek says:

    Depends on whether Sussex County is where Dave Burris needs them.

  15. Von Cracker says:

    Good question.

    Where’s the Capitol of Sussex?

    My vote is Selbyville…just b/c it’s fun to say and makes me think of Don Knotts.

  16. MJ says:

    County seat is Georgetown.

  17. Delaware Dem says:

    Nah, Georgetown is the current county seat, so it will be the capital.

    This fun discussion reminds me of something: I think Delaware should have 5 counties, not 3.

    1. New Castle County (everything above the canal).

    2. Appoquinimink County (canal to the Kent Co. line, county seat will be Middletown)

    3. Kent County

    4. Lewes County (Lewes, Rehoboth, Dewey, Bethany, Fenwick, and the back bay towns).

    5. Sussex County

  18. Von Cracker says:

    We know that, but it doesn’t have to be the Capitol. The partisans in Seaford might want to have a say!

  19. Von Cracker says:

    Here’s a serious question:

    With the 2010 census coming up, do you think DE will get an additional Rep? District 1 being NCC and D2 Kent and Sussex?

  20. Von Cracker says:

    Sorry – Capitol Capital

  21. The capital’s got to be Gumboro (pronounced Gum-brr-uh), where former State Rep. Charlie West once served as a proud member of (El Somnambulo is not making this up) the National Association for the Advancement of White People. Volunteer Fire Hall’d make a mighty fine Capitol Building….

  22. R Smitty says:

    I doubt it, VC. I don’t get into the numbers, but rather take an easy look at the states above us in population ranking and all of the “3’s” (2 Senate + 1 Rep) still ahead.

  23. Von Cracker says:

    I doubt it too, but it makes sense when looking at the interests of both regions…

    RI has 2 with a pop of just over 1 million; we have 873,000. So if the census comes back with DE over 1 million, I think there will be a lobby for it…

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_U.S._states_by_population

  24. R Smitty says:

    Wow. Honestly, I didn’t realize we were up to 45th in the rankings (44 if you look only at states and not territories). OK, maybe that could change. We did have a big boom here this decade, so maybe it’s not so impossible.

    BTW, Washington DC has more population than the entire state of Wyoming?! WTF?

  25. Mrs XStryker says:

    Seriously though, it amazes me that they’re all up in arms about it. If I lived more than 60 miles from Newark there is NO WAY that I would go have breakfast there. Get up all early? It was bad enough for X to get there, and he only had a 20 minute drive.

  26. Since I have my state employee hat on, and can speak for the Delaware Population Consortium (I’m the DPC Secretary), I will say that the projected population for Delaware isn’t expected to top 1 million until after 2020.

    And, when I ask Census Bureau redistricting staff about when we might get another Rep, they always answer: “never.” It has something to do with a limit on the number of Congress-folk and some other state needing to lose a significant amount of people while we gain a significant amount for the math to ever work out for us.

  27. liberalgeek says:

    Yes, the number is capped at 435 Congress Critters. I’m sure that there is some cool formula that they use, but I think it would be hard for us to break into the 2+ club.

    Although with the Current NCC Council, if builders wanted to do all sorts of high-rises, we may get there.

  28. Unstable Isotope says:

    Actually, LG, there’s a bill in Congress that would increase the House to 437 reps. One for D.C. (which has no representation) and one more for Utah.

  29. Maria Evans says:

    So WANTING to participate in the meeting means we’re “secessionists”? Yeah, that makes perfect sense.

    A more accurate title to this post would have been “Governor Un-Annexes Kent and Sussex”

  30. liberalgeek says:

    Maria,

    You don’t want to meet with the Governor, you want to bitch about not meeting with him. If you wanted to meet with the Governor, you would have sent emails to his staff and asked.

    It must be fun to not have any responsibility for your own content gathering. Luckily, your own blog was represented by a Republican. Perhaps he wouldn’t pass your litmus test as a conservative, but he certainly used to be part of the “in” crowd of Republicans.

    Hopefully you will finally get an email out to the Guv and you will be able to have a deep philosophical discussion with him, David Anderson and Frank Knotts.

    Be sure to invite Mike Mahaffie, Redwaterlilly, Brian and Elbert. Or don’t, you are the one doing the legwork, right?

  31. anon says:

    El Som – I know this won’t sound like much of a comeback (and it isn’t), but at least our racists were out in the open. Y’all rich folk had to have busing to force your secret racists’ kids into integrated schools, a mess which is apparently still reverberating today and which I yet don’t completely understand.

    Yet the other day I did see a photo from the ’60s of a Klan cross-burning in Bear or Middletown. Sonofagun, there are sheetheads up north…

  32. True, but ‘bulo lived in a community that deliberately integrated BEFORE Brown v. Board of Education. And he’s still proud of that fact.

  33. Maria Evans says:

    LG are you saying that every blogger sitting in that room today emailed the governor’s office and asked to be invited? That’s not what I’m hearing.

    Sussex County bloggers have email addresses as easily obtainable as any of the bloggers who sat in that room today.

  34. a. price says:

    Bear and Middle town are NOT up north. i lived in Bear….. might as well have been south carolina….
    this one time, i went into a manhattan bagel…. asked for whitefish salad (a sacred food of the Jewish people) and they DIDNT KNOW WHAT IT WAS!!!!! they offered me Lox Cream cheese.
    THE HORROR. thank goodness for Wilmington.

  35. a. price says:

    Holy Crap Maria, DROP IT. i wasn’t invited either. you don’t see me bitching about the delaware barista representation. seriously have a right wing nut job round table. i wonder if Jason and Pandora will whine for 6 hours…. i mean im SURE Donviti will ( 😉 ) but god damn woman! let it go, and contribute something useful.

  36. anon says:

    Can someone remind me – what is Selander’s job with Markell, anyway? Communications czar?

    I tried to find it on his web site, but Mr. Transparency apparently doesn’t have a list of his staff online, just general office numbers.

  37. anonone says:

    Maria, did you cry like this when you weren’t asked to go to your senior prom?

  38. Shoe Throwing Instructor says:

    All right, let`s not repeat Lincoln`s mistake, Let them go, let them go, for God`s sake wish them well and let them go.

  39. anon says:

    I agree, Shoe Throwing Instructor. Those idiots from the State of New Castle-Wilmington can leave, and good riddance! And they can take Cecil County with them. Chesapeake City sounds like it’d be perfect to annex into Newark. Lots of party opportunities for those drunk UD kids.

    We’ll dynamite the canal and float off into the Atlantic. You’ll have to come begging to us every time you want to have chicken for dinner.

  40. R Smitty says:

    #36…I think his job is to annoy the piss out of people that walk around thinking people exist just to annoy the piss out of them.

  41. anon says:

    RSmitty…. Uhm… come again? That’s way too deep for a Sussex hick like me.

  42. Correction Officer says:

    Lets get something straight right now, Maria is NOT from Sussex! Shes a yankee from New Castle, and you can have her back.

  43. anon says:

    “Lets get something straight right now, Maria is NOT from Sussex! Shes a yankee from New Castle, and you can have her back.”

    Bars closed today, Atkins?

  44. R Smitty says:

    41: [Selander’s] job is to annoy the piss out of certain people.stop. People, who just so happen to be the same people who believe that everyone else is on this earth just to piss them off.stop.

    It’s snark…smart-@$$ snark, but snark, nonetheless.

  45. Unstable Isotope says:

    Come to think of it, my feelings are now hurt that I wasn’t invited. I know I’m just a commenter, but it’s so unfair!

  46. a. price says:

    thats what I’m saying. I’ve been making insane claims and adding nothing but filler to the conversation for over a year now. Maria, UI, lets go on strike

  47. R Smitty says:

    Oh, that’s great. What’s next, benefits for commenters? Maybe it’s time to post a big, inflatable rat on top of this site! OPPRESSION!

    Wait. I was there. Crap. I think that makes me an OPPRESSOR! I go on strike against myself…right after I lock myself out.

  48. a. price says:

    COMMENTERS OF THE WORLD UNITE. Maria we NEED you for our glorious revolution!!!!!!

  49. Correction Officer says:

    #43 wrong! although I did see Atkins at S.C.I. last week. He usually strolls through at least once a month.

  50. Correction Officer says:

    Speaking of Sussex County has anyone seen this? http://www.sccor.org

  51. anon says:

    “although I did see Atkins at S.C.I. last week. He usually strolls through at least once a month.”

    Voluntarily or is that part of his probation?

  52. Jesus. I would have driven all of the way up there, especially to meet the Governor… but I probably would have just sat there and soaked it in, afraid to speak up.

    Anyway, driving 2 hours each way anywhere for a one hour meeting is downright silly… especially if your first question would have been “where the gambling chapter of your book, Governor?”

    Sheesh.

    I mean, it would have been nice to be invited, but the logistics of it is insane, and the reasoning behind not being invited is completely understandable.

    Can you imagine a Sussex County blogger meet and greet? After the 10 minute prayer and the 15 minute conversation about how gay people threaten the family… Markell’s head would explode.

  53. a. price says:

    He would be in extreme danger. Georgetown is so anti-jewish they might try to give our Heeb Gov a reverse circumcision.

  54. MJ says:

    A. Price – guess I need to be careful when I’m in Georgetown or driving thru on the way to Bridgeville. I’ll keep my yarmulke in the glove box, but don’t know how I can hide my payes.

  55. Unstable Isotope says:

    That’s right, a. price — STRIKE!!! Sorry Smitty, you’re not invited, oppressor.

  56. a. price says:

    i can’t find the links, nor do i have the motivation to look for it, but.. i think it was Georgetown… residents basically forced out their lone Jewish family.

    That was for MJ incase there was sarcasm in the comment. if not, and you are in fact a fellow chosen people, you’ll understand why I’ve decided to have a different opinion than you. (2 jews, 3 opinions)

    UI, let’s go comrade

  57. R Smitty says:

    Be quiet UI & a.price and get back to commenting…and make sure you enjoy it or no Markell for you! Grrrr…..

  58. a. price says:

    and just for general info, even though i AM on strike with comrades UI and Maria as a commenter because of oppressors like DD and pandora, i will still post here. mostly because i have nothing else to do.

  59. a. price says:

    yes ma’sah

  60. Unstable Isotope says:

    If I stop commenting that’s what they want!!! Therefore I will keep commenting to deny the oppressors victory.

  61. a. price says:

    UI, we are like Marx and Engels

  62. Joanne Christian says:

    Umm, UI and a.price, can I ride in the back seat if I bring a Lox box ?

    I would never have been so presumptious, to think to be included. I thought it was nice enough of DL to ask what we all wanted to ask, and they would translate for me. Hef, did a fine job of getting right back to us–and in list form!

  63. MJ says:

    A Price – I am a MOT (for my gentile, non-gefilte fish eating friends, that stands for Member of the Tribe).

  64. David says:

    I have thought that below the canal could join with the Eastern shore of Maryland to form a great state, maybe add VA to the tunnel. It would be the east coast haven for common sense.

    My objection is that Sussex can’t leave Kent.

  65. anon says:

    a. price,

    I believe you’re recalling the case over prayer in the Indian River School District a few years back. That covers Georgetown, Millsboro, Dagsboro, Selbyville, etc., not just the county seat. There were two Jewish families involved, one of whom I believe did leave town. The other was never identified in court papers for fear of retaliation.

  66. anon says:

    Odd question:

    Besides RSmitty and David Anderson, are there even any bloggers from Kent? It just seems kind of like a dead zone.

  67. a. price says:

    thats the one anon. so i reassert my warning to Markell…. beware of lower De

  68. Joanne Christian says:

    anon–

    question rescue:

    Besides David Anderson….
    RSmitty is sighted all over LNCC–previous favorite haunt the 9th district. But since he needs “his space” right now, I’ll just leave a light on…but he’s not crossed county lines too!

  69. RSmitty says:

    I’m here and I’m….
    …in Lower NCCo.

    Joanne is correct, but don’t worry, JC. I haven’t gone anywhere. Plus, I do believe I saw you Monday night (if that was you), but you took off too quick for me to say hi. If it wasn’t you, then get out of my imagination, will you?!?!

  70. anon says:

    Ah, sorry. I thought you were in northern Kent for some odd reason. My bad.