33.09% of Delaware Voters Have Only Themselves to Blame

You might well be one of them. That’s the percentage of voters, as of March 6, who are registered as Unaffiliated. I have just one question: Why?

I bring this up because Mike Smith – the original one, the Republican House member who represents Pike Creek, not the johnny-come-lately who’s running for state treasurer as a Democrat – has introduced HB 188, which would let unaffiliated voters cast ballots in primary elections. To quote the House Republican newsletter,

Rep. Smith said the change is needed because many races in Delaware are decided, or effectively decided, through primary elections. He argues that not allowing unaffiliated voters to participate essentially shuts them out of the electoral process.

Oh, boo-fucking-hoo. Whose fault is that? If you want to be part of the electoral process, REGISTER AS A DEMOCRAT, YOU DUMBFUCKS! You won’t get cooties, they won’t make you wear all-blue clothing, you won’t be shunned by your neighbors, unless they’re even dumber fucks than you are.

It’s not like people don’t do this already. Jack Markell upset John Carney in the 2008 gubernatorial primary by getting hundreds of erstwhile Republicans to switch to the Democrats. When I first moved to Hockessin it was solidly Republican, so I registered as a Republican specifically so I could vote against the worst of them in primary elections. It allowed me to vote against John “Son of” Clatworthy in the state senate primary in 2008, though he won anyway, then narrowly lost to Dr. Michael Katz in the general. To further illustrate my point, the same Michael Katz is now running for the U.S. Senate – as a Republican.

For a reason I’ll never understand, most Americans think that they should register as a member of the party that best represents their values, or some such nonsense. Why would you do that? It’s not like anyone knows what party affiliation you register under. It’s not like you have to pay dues. It brings you no meaningful advantage except the right to brag, “I’m a lifelong (fill in the blank).”

The sensible thing to do – and smart people in jurisdictions dominated by one party or the other know and do this – is to register as a member of whichever party dominates your district or county or state. Lots of would-be officeholders already do this. Why do you think someone like Ted Lauzen is running for treasurer as a Democrat? It sure isn’t because he’s chock full of progressive values.

Registering that way has the further benefit of fucking with the people who want to gerrymander districts based on voter registration. That’s the opposite of what Pike Creek Mike proposes, which is letting the unaffiliated fuck with the elections of any party they choose.

We don’t need open primaries to give people a say in government. We only need smarter voters.